The concept of being ‘that girl’ on the internet has had a resurgence lately, inspiring women across the globe to be their ‘best’ and most productive selves.
We all know ‘that girl’ – she’s that girl who eats well and looks after her physical health, that girl who sticks to a solid routine in order to work at her most productive, and generally that girl who has her life together.
That girl sounds pretty impressive, but I have to be honest and wonder – does anyone truly know ‘that girl’?
As women aspire to live their life in accordance with the TikTok examples of how to be ‘that girl’, I have to wonder a few things:
- What does it actually mean to be ‘that girl’?
- Is the trend helping or hindering girls who try to emulate it?
- Is anyone really ‘that girl’, or is it another illusion traversing the internet and showing an unattainable lifestyle that, in reality, few people actually manage to adhere to?
Internet fads have always existed, and whilst some actually may have some benefit and merit – such as the main character mindset – some fall short of actually resulting in positive lifestyle change, and are really just a self-help manifesto disguised by appealing aesthetics and perfectly constructed ‘lifestyles’ (that often perpetuate harmful mindsets of toxic productivity, and self-value based on output and ‘busyness’).
Is the ‘that girl’ trend another example of this, or is there some merit to the tips offered in this trend?
Firstly, what exactly is ‘that girl’?
There are a couple of variations to the traits associated with being ‘that girl’ and it has seen some change over time.
The core traits that are most associated with the trend however have seen some longevity, and still remain in place despite the progression of the trend. The core values tend to revolve around organizing your life to maximize productivity and maintain a ‘healthy’ lifestyle, with plenty of water, nutritious food, and of course, exercise:
Doesn’t sound so bad, right?
Well, whilst these ideals aren’t fundamentally bad, there are most definitely sinister undertones to how they are being presented to people.
- A lot of the routines start with an early wake-up, usually between 6 – 7 am, followed by a morning workout (though, sometimes this can be yoga instead).
- Then, it’s time for a shower and some healthy breakfast (complete with a fancy glass of water, complemented with some lemon and lime slices).
- Following that comes some aesthetic day planning in your favorite journal, complete with a handy to-do list.
The routine then tends to shift depending on the person and their work/employment, but the morning routine tends to revolve around the above 3 main points.
Whilst I like the idea of getting up early and getting some exercise in; I have to be real – getting up at 7 is difficult enough, and I’m lucky if I can drag my groggy butt out of bed by 7:15, and then it’s a rush to get out the door for 8. Then it’s a cup of coffee from Starbucks and ready at my desk for 9, half-asleep and suffering from some serious brain fog.
I cannot imagine how I would be able to stick to a ‘that girl’ routine with my current lifestyle.
And to be honest – I don’t really think that I want to either.
Is the trend helping or hindering girls who try to emulate it?
I’m not going to hate on the whole trend, getting up early and having a morning routine is sure to have health benefits – plus, getting up and having a bit of exercise would help you wake up and feel a bit brighter for the day ahead.
I also don’t think that there’s anything wrong with wanting to be the best version of yourself and seeking ways to grow as an individual and introduce healthy habits in order to achieve that.
However, living in a society that already puts so much pressure on its young women, it’s worrying to see even more high standards being set and masqueraded as advice to improve your lifestyle.
It’s another trend that unfortunately pushes the ‘badass girl boss’ ideology in an unattainable and unhealthy way. It also pushes the hustle culture that we’ve seen explode in recent years – and as someone who has tried to balance a bunch of things in the name of productivity, it is not healthy for anyone.
Toxic productivity is a very real problem, and the internet is guilty of perpetuating the mindset that productivity = value.
It’s also been pointed out that this kind of culture, the so-called ‘hustle culture’, is a lifestyle choice that is not feasible for normal people.
Generally, the people you see being ‘that girl’, are self-employed influencers. Being self-employed, they have the flexibility in their day that ordinary people on a 9-5 do not.
Of course, you can try to implement some of the habits that will work with your day, and some of the videos are made by people who do work conventional hours – so it’s possible, but the majority of people endorsing this trend (or at least, the most extreme versions of it) are self-employed.
But the idea that the more productive you are, the better version of yourself you are, needs to stop.
Furthermore, the idea that being self-employed and entrepreneurial makes you a better version of yourself, as opposed to the normal 9-5 you, is leading to a rise of shame amongst people who feel that they are failures because they haven’t achieved this capitalist-centered level of ‘success’.
Plus, the mantra that ‘anyone can be that girl’ is, quite plainly, false. Not everyone can be that girl. Not everyone is in a position, financially or mentally, to ditch the 9-5 life and embark on an entrepreneurial journey either. Not everyone is middle class and has something to fall back on if they fail.
It’s no wonder that so many women feel that they aren’t good enough when their value is being reduced to whether they are 1) conventionally attractive by society’s standards, and 2) conventionally ‘successful’ by being a ‘girl boss’ / ‘that girl’.
Is anyone really ‘that girl’, or is it another illusion traversing the internet and showing an unattainable lifestyle that, in reality, few people actually manage to adhere to?
As I’ve already mentioned above, a lot of the TikTok/YouTube videos of girls being ‘that girls’, are being made by influencers and people who are self-employed.
They are a minority in the grand scheme of things, and their circumstances facilitate this lifestyle in a way that an average person’s does not.
Plus, I believe that these videos & routines should be viewed with skepticism – remember that the clips you’re saying have been carefully constructed and specifically chosen to show the best and most aesthetic parts of that person’s life – it doesn’t show the cons of their lifestyle, and to be honest, it doesn’t prove that they actually live like that every day themselves.
I love the internet, I think it’s a wonderful place where you can access information and gain inspiration in a flash, but the internet is not reflected of real life, especially on social media. Anyone can make their life seem perfect with a couple of pictures and some carefully thought-out posts, and this is something we all need to bear in mind when we’re comparing our ‘failures’ in life to someone else’s ‘success’.
I’m glad to see women stand up and speak out against the high standards being circulated on the net, and it’s been refreshing to see girls reclaim the ‘that girl’ trend and trying to shift the focus from productivity to mental wellbeing instead. I don’t think that the people making the videos should be too harshly criticised – if they really do stick to those routines and it works for them, that is amazing.
What needs to change is how these routines are presented to people – it’s not for everyone and that’s okay. Everyone’s definition of success is different; the internet just has a tendency to capitalize on one particular version and then purport it as the sole one.
At the end of the day, we are our best selves when we’re at our happiest – not at our most productive.
Read More: The Huggy Wuggy Trend On TikTok and YouTube is Definitely Not Kid Friendly
