As the first month of the new year passes, self improvement enthusiast’s are stressing to put their resolutions and goals into action. With the stress of wanting the motto “new year, new me” to come to fruition, they often create elaborate self-care plans. However, sometimes an essential step to your self-care journey is some much-needed alone time.
There is a stigma that spending time alone means that you are inherently lonely, but this is not always the case. Using alone time as a form of self-care is intentional. There are people who rush to plan elaborate recipes, workouts, or wardrobes in hopes that it will allow them to transform into their “best self.” In actuality, self-care can be simpler. Alone time can be a self-improvement remedy to help one put their busy work or school day stress aside.
What does it mean to actively spend time alone?
There is a difference between simply being alone and actively spending time with yourself. Spending active time alone helps with emotional introspection and self-reflection. Although human connection is essential for your social and emotional well-being, alone time helps to understand who you are and what you want your life to look like.
Days that are constantly on the go and are filled with engaging conversation can sometimes drain your social battery. This is normal. Socializing uses specific brainpower that requires energy. This energy is not ongoing. This is why even the most eventful and enjoyable day around your friends can lead to feeling burnt out.
There comes a time when you need to rest and recharge so that your social battery can be at its best once again. This is when active alone time comes into play. People often fear that they are being judged if they engage in an activity alone that is typically done in a group. However, this “exposure therapy” is what allows you to prioritize yourself. Alone time allows you not to put yourself in a box; this is a time to develop a greater self-awareness about what you personally enjoy.
Taking a “solo date” is the first step from breaking away from the fear of spending active time alone. This allows for uninterrupted time to reflect on activities you are fond of and helps you be present in the moment. Not only is this a time for self-reflection, but these activities help boost your confidence to engage in new adventures!
Emphasizing that “no one is watching me” is a prime way to get over the stigma of alone time. By starting off with simple activities such as taking a walk to a coffee shop, you can start to bring your walls down.
Developing hobbies
If a “solo date” seems too intimidating, explore different hobbies. We are all guilty of constantly scrolling on social media. However, this “hobby” can be toxic. Even if you scroll on social media for advice on self-care, this could lead to comparison. Looking at someone through a screen engage in meditation does nothing for your own personal journey to self-improvement. Instead, try out hobbies on your own. You never know what will spark your interest.
The choice of hobbies is endless. If you prefer indoor hobbies, start to think about what might be best for you. If you need an alone time hobby that is calming, try a paint-by-number kit. This is a creative activity containing a painting that is pre-divided into sections with different numbers. These numbers have a corresponding color that goes with them. In the end, you can create an elegant art piece that requires no artistic experience. This allows your focus to be solely on the different boxes, hopefully resulting in a relaxing experience.
If this indoor hobby is not for you, there are still countless others to choose from. If you feel that your active alone time would serve you better outside, then choose one that is outdoors. Engage in a walk around your city. Meditate on your front porch. In addition to all the physical benefits, outdoor hobbies can be a quick escape from any current stressors.
Alone time activities are endless. Pick one and try it out. If it’s not for you, attempt a new one. Active alone time for self-care requires experimenting to understand your true passions. Still, that does not mean abandoning all alone time activities if the first one is not a perfect fit.
Self-care off the screen
According to Sophie Lazarus, a clinical psychologist in the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Health at the Ohio State University, even taking a few minutes out of your day for alone time is important. This is not a selfish act. Additionally, allowing yourself to put all distractions aside is crucial.
We live in an age where our phones are always present. It provides us with essential information and news, allows us to interact and connect with individuals, and helps us to capture pivotal moments in our lives. Nevertheless, taking a break from our screens is what allows us to truly be present. Although our phone notifications boost dopamine levels, they are also the cause of anxiety and comparison.
Spending active alone time off the screens allows you to put your focus into your own personal growth, not anyone else’s. It can be easy to compare yourself to a social media post where a person looks like they have their whole life planned out. However, we don’t know who this person truly is.
Alone time as a form of self-care is best off the screens because this ensures no interruptions. When psychologist Adrian Ward at the University of Texas at Austin conducted a study involving 467 participants (ages 18 to 74) to block their internet access for two weeks, he found that both their attention span and mental health improved. The urge to constantly check your notifications on your phone is an ingrained habit. However, taking time off the screen to engage in personal hobbies, you’d better focus on your task at hand: self-improvement.
Alone time that is truly useful requires your full attention to reflect on your personal well-being. By taking the time stop thinking about other people, you can completely prioritize yourself. And remember, this is not selfish. Alone time off the screen is a time to refresh your mind and focus on your own interests without any
The power of solitude
The power of solitude and space as a form of self-care is what allows for deep, emotional introspection. Oftentimes, the anxiety and stress of spending large amounts of time in group settings come to a breaking point. The desire to be alone is more than okay. Solitude helps you allow for a release of any intense or bundled up emotions.
Developing a plan for your solitude and space is essential. Active alone time demands concentration in order to properly reflect on any built-up emotions: a time for a reboot. A useful way to use solitude to assist your self-improvement journey is by implementing meditation. There are many forms of meditation, but all of these methods require calm and deep mindfulness to try to better your wellbeing.
If you feel lost and stressed about where to start in your meditation journey, try forms that are guided. Although this may require a screen, these guided meditations simply walk you through exercises. There is no scrolling required. These guided exercises focus on deep breathing, allowing your thoughts to come to the forefront of your brain.
Guided meditation videos emphasize that it is normal have your thoughts scattered and distracting. However, being able to recognize your negative or uncomfortable feelings is extremely important. This alone time as a form of self-care helps shut out all your distractions and affirm to yourself that by taking the time (even for just five minutes) to complete this activity, you are making progress in your journey to self-improvement.
Conclusion
The journey to self-improvement looks different for everyone. However, using active alone time as a form of self-care is overlooked in bettering your wellbeing. Whether you choose to take a “solo date,” engage in a creative activity such as paint-by-numbers, or participate in a guided meditation session, each of these unique activities allows for a reboot from the busy world around you.
The stigma around alone time and being alone in general needs to end. Even taking a couple of minutes out of your day to have solitude and space can allow you to reflect on your emotions and passions. Spending time off the screen can help shift your focus to your own personal goals, not what you witness on your screen.
Therefore, the next time you feel like you need a break from the social scene around you, engage in active alone time. This reboot will hopefully yield success in recharging your mind and furthering your journey to self-improvement.
