A band breakup has to be near the top of the list of most emotionally painful moments. From the Beatles to N’Sync to Guns N’ Roses, no music genre or decade has been spared heartbreaking band splits. Sure, these bands had worldwide reach, and maybe that globally shared pain made those breakups hurt all the more. But what happens when your band breaks up, and you’re nobodies from Canada…but then you write the best NSFW split-up statement of all time?
Honestly, this breakup statement is going to make Witchrot more famous than their music. Sorry, fellas. If you haven’t heard of Witchrot, they’re a metal band from Toronto. Not much is known about the band. Their Facebook bio simply reads “hex, drugs, and rock n’ roll.” Though the band has released an EP, all was not right in the state of Denmark.
While bands have broken up for myriad reasons (think jealousy, drugs, and money, to name a few), Witchrot’s takes the cake for most unique and most NSFW.
Over the weekend, the band posted the following on their Facebook page:
We feel for you, Peter. Always a shame when you find out your band’s guitarist has been secretly getting it on with your long-term girlfriend. While parts of this statement are a tad dramatic, it makes for great comedic relief.
Oh, way to throw in that your drummer died too. A macabre joke? Perhaps – Witchrot is a metal band after all. But in any case, RIP to the drummer (if it’s true) and the band as well.
Quite the shocks this band is having lately. But as Peter said, let’s hope all this pain goes toward creating some raw and successful music. Come back soon, Witchrot!
We can’t decide which is crazier, Witchrot’s breakup statement or this band’s tour hoax. Take a look for yourself and decide.
