Mary Bronstein has hit a home run with her psychological-dramedy If I Had Legs I’d Kick You. The film is produced by A24, so you already know it’s going to be strange, deranged, and original as hell. Rose Byrne takes on the role of her career as a mother on the edge, trying to hold it all together as her life falls apart around her. And the supporting cast? None other than comedian Conan O’Brien and rapper A$AP Rocky. So yeah, this thing is a trip!
A24 has always been known to green-light audacious and odd pictures, and they’re keeping that reputation going in 2025. While Opus was (wrongly) panned, and Eddington was a tonal disaster, Bronstein’s vision of motherhood is getting the love it deserves. What makes this film stand out from some other big swings over at A24 recently? Its simplicity. This is a character study about the ups and downs, and downs, of being a mother in the modern age. And it is a distinctly hilarious nightmare.
The A24 expectations
A24 is such a wonderful company. They have produced some of the most popular films of the 21st century, while also churning out dozens of indie films that rarely make it to the commercial movie theaters. Whether you love them or hate them, it must be admitted, there’s nobody doing it like A24 these days.
So, when that big bright logo stretches into place on the big screen, I still get excited to this day. Though I’ve been disappointed many a time by this production company, I’m always hopeful that the next one will be a banger. I actually loved Opus, and the more I think about it, I kind of hated Eddington. With all that in mind, I was prepared for anything with If I Had Legs I’d Kick You. But- great news! I utterly adore it.
That being said, this is not an entirely recommendable film- like most A24 outings, its very specific. If you’re not tuned into its surreal and loopy vibe, then you will most likely be lost, repulsed, and utterly confused. But! If you just let Bronstein and Byrne take you on this journey of high anxiety and dark hilarity, you will not be disappointed.
Get Rose Byrne an Oscar!
Rose Bryne has always been a force to be reckoned with, but this role allows her to go all out. From comedies such as Bridesmaids, to horror films such as Insidious, there’s not much she has not done. This is one of those performances critics are saying is “a performance of a lifetime”, and honestly? I absolutely agree.
Bryne gives one of the most utterly honest performances I’ve ever seen, and it’s not glamorous- it’s harrowing. While she is the heroine of the story, Linda is an entirely unlikeable protagonist. This of course, is the point, as we are seeing her as she approaches her way down to rock bottom. While impulsive and irresponsible, Linda is extremely sympathetic, as we watch her face some of the most uncooperative people on the planet.
Linda must also face a myriad of high stakes problems in her day-to-day. A sick child who won’t eat. An absent husband who works away from home weeks at a time. A therapist who can’t help her, hard as he tries. A missing person that she may or may not be responsible for. And on top of all that? A giant hole has opened up in the bedroom of her apartment, forcing her and her sick daughter to take shelter in a motel by the beach. Needless to say- Linda doesn’t have it good, and Rose Byrne captures a level of tired angst with a bravura for days.
An eclectic cast to boot
Rose Byrne, Conan O’Brien, and A$AP Rocky. While there have been many exciting casts to see in theaters this year, these three headliners are hard to beat! It’s a small miracle that Bronstein was able to bring them together to create her twisted story- and everyone understands the assignment.
Conan in his first serious acting role? You betcha, and he kills it, of course. The biting dark comedy suits his personality, but he also plays a completely straight-laced therapist, as against type as any actor has ever been. A$AP Rocky also came completely out of left field, but he does a hilariously good job as Linda’s new neighbor. Seems he’s got the acting bug, with this and Highest 2 Lowest under his belt, and I’d be happy to see what he does next.
The auxiliary characters are rounded out with a variety of somewhat recognizable character actors, making Linda’s hellish world unbearably quirky and bizarre. Lastly, I must mention that the actor who plays Linda’s husband does a fantastic job, while mainly just being heard through a cell phone. I dare not spoil who the actor is, as I was trying to guess who’s voice it was the entire runtime- and the reveal is a nice surprise.
Get Mary Bronstein an Oscar
The technical craft being displayed here is beautifully warped, let me tell you. I’d say about 75% of the film is composed of claustrophobic close ups of Rose Byrne, and it works perfectly to trap us in this mother’s non-stop nightmare. There is so much to love about the visuals in the film, as they start to get trippy at the least expected of times. The locations are used cleverly, for both humor and suspense, and the same can be said for the lighting and music.
It’s ultimately a slice of life, but at the same time, leans ever so close to being a psychological-horror film. The anxious ins and outs of Linda’s life will shock and appall, and there is nothing to do but sit back and watch, either in delight or disgust. One moment, you’ll be laughing your ass off. The next, you’re squirming in your seat. Then, you’ll be on the verge of tears, right before you start laughing your ass off again. It’s a rollercoaster, for sure, one that doesn’t let up until the last frame.
So, do you like the “hard to watch” stuff? Do you like twisted, darkly comedic dramas about how scary and hard life is? Do you like Rose Byrne, Conan O’Brien, and A$AP Rocky? If you answered yes to any of these questions, get to the theaters now!
If I Had Legs I’d Kick You is now playing in select theaters.
