Shakespeare once said “what’s in a name?” and many of us take that to mean that one’s name, which occasionally implies one’s status, is insignificant. Clearly, Shakespeare forgot about DJ names. From slightly embarrassing to definitively terrible, the ten DJ names listed down below are the epitome of cringe-worthy nicknames. Brace yourselves:
10. DJ TWAT
I don’t know of anyone who would proudly call themselves a twat, but there’s a first time for everything. What’s really sad about this name is that the “TWAT” stands for There Was A Time, which is an infinitely better option than the acronym itself.
9. Minghead
Is there a new trend amongst upcoming DJs to give themselves nicknames that are essentially an insult? It seems like it. The connection between “ming” and the British word minger, meaning an unpleasant person, cannot be missed. We’ll pass on this DJ name.
8. Bass Bumpers
I’m not sure what exactly makes Bass Bumpers sound so terrible. I can’t help but picture two bass beats crashing into each other, which doesn’t seem too soundly.
7. Pants & Socks
Pants and socks are typically the most boring clothing articles, so we can only imagine how exciting DJ “Pants and Socks” sounds.
6. The Cool Willy Brothers
The Cool Willy Brothers consists of the brotherly duo, 24-year-old twins Rupert and Olly Wilde-Water. They might be pretty cool, but as for their DJ name? Not so much.
5. DJ Fanny
Before you ask, no. Fanny is not in honor of Barbra Streisand’s iconic role as Fanny Brice in the renowned Funny Girl (1964), which leaves us with very little options as to what it could possibly be referencing. In relation to its dictionary definition, the name triggers uncomfortable pre-teen memories for some of us. Did someone say buttocks?
4. Chinese Man
This is a French electro-swing group, meaning that not a single one of them are Chinese. Enough said.
3. DJ Gary Glitter
A name as stale as Gary being juxtaposed with a word as eccentric as Glitter seems oxymoronic to me. Throw in the fact that the actual Gary Glitter is a pedophiliac creep to top it off. No thanks.
2. Inflatable Führer
From child abuse to Nazism, the list keeps getting better. (Clearly not.)
1. Armand Van Hard On
I’ll set the scene. It’s a night out at the club with your friends. Laughter fills the air as the dance floor grows in size. The music is excellent. It’s the perfect vibe and suddenly someone shouts “Armand Van Hard On”, thanking him for his electronic beats. A complete buzz killer.
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The original article covering this topic appeared on Thump.
