I love love, and I’ve always been a hopeless romantic, but truthfully, I don’t always love reading rom-coms. Contemporary romance can often feel oversaturated with tired tropes, unrealistic dialogue, and flat characters who fall in insta-lust.
Despite the qualms I have about the romance genre, I still enjoy consuming media centering love, relationships, and human connection. Humans are social creatures. There’s undeniably something special about love and its various forms that resonates with us.
If you are also tired of the overused rom-com formula but still want to pick up a book about love this Valentine’s Day or during the month of love, I have eleven book recommendations for you. These books span various genres outside of the romance genre. Even so, they all center love, relationships, and human connection as major themes.
1. All About Love by bell hooks
bell hooks was a groundbreaking Black feminist scholar and activist known for her intersectional work, postmodern female perspective, and perspectives on love. Her writing has been extremely influential in feminist and racial justice movements. I would highly recommend everyone to read her work.
All About Love is an accessible entry point. The book critiques common societal norms surrounding love and draws upon hooks’ broader work, asserting that love is first and foremost an action rather than a feeling. hooks also argues that love is political. Societal structures such as capitalism and the patriarchy unknowingly impact our ways of loving. While many things have changed since this book’s original publication, many of hooks’ ideas are still deeply insightful and relevant today. Reading this book challenged my own perception of love. It has allowed me to change my own relationship with it to something more positive.
2. Everything I Know About Love by Dolly Alderton
Journalist and author Dolly Alderton’s bestselling memoir Everything I Know About Love is an honest and witty picture of girlhood and how Alderton navigated her life in her 20s. The memoir has been popular on BookTok and social media for years and justifiably so. While not all of Alderton’s experiences are relatabl, there are aspects of her experience that undoubtedly resonated for me as a female reader, like her experience navigating unhealthy relationships with men and with her body. Moreover, the book’s real focus is on the importance of female friendship.
I’d recommend this book for anyone who wants to decenter romantic love in their lives. Romantic love gets a lot of attention, especially around Valentine’s Day. Other forms of love, such as friendships and familial love, can often feel swept to the side. Alderton’s insights might not be the most groundbreaking of all time, but her memoir is nonetheless very introspective and heartwarming.
3. Lovely War by Julie Berry
This young adult historical romance is a twist on the conventional historical novel, interweaving two love stories set during World War I. Hazel and James fall in love shortly before James is deployed, and Aubrey and Colette both see love as the last thing on their minds before they meet each other by chance. Greek gods narrate the central love story against the backdrop of World War II. They want to determine why love and war are drawn to one another. This novel tackles heavy themes such as prejudice and trauma with immense grace, hope, and humanity.
What I love most about Lovely War isn’t necessarily the love story of the two couples. There’s so much richness and complexity in this book that transcends the romance plot. Berry’s prose is gorgeous and rich with figurative language. The characters are strong, resilient, and incredibly human. Most of all, though, I found this book to be a testament to the power of love and the goodness of humanity in the face of incredible tragedy and hardship.
4. Persuasion by Jane Austen
Jane Austen is known for being one of the greatest English writers and one of the first great women writers in English. While not strictly a romance writer, her novels all center around themes of love and marriage. She also offers witty commentary on the economic dependence of women in the 19th century. Austen’s novels elevate ordinary and domestic life as significant, and she explores the hopes and dreams of her heroines, which frequently include love.
Persuasion is her last completed novel; it was posthumously published, and it is known for being Austen’s most mature work. The novel follows Anne Elliot, the daughter of a baronet who is still unmarried at twenty-seven and close to spinsterhood. As a result of her father’s lavish spending, the family is in financial trouble, so they rent out their estate and move to Bath. After settling in, Anne runs into Captain Frederick Wentworth, whom she had been formerly engaged to seven years prior. The engagement initially ended because Anne’s family disapproved of his lower socioeconomic status. When they meet again, Anne gets a second chance at love.
While Austen’s other novels may be more popular, Persuasion is well worth your time. The social commentary is sharp and biting, the heroine is intelligent and compelling, and the love story is full of yearning and passion.
5. This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone
Co-written by two award-winning science fiction authors, this novella is a genre-defying sapphic love story following two rival agents from warring factions who begin a correspondence across time and space, amongst a dying world. This is How You Lose the Time War takes the form of letters, blending science fiction and lyrical, luscious prose. The worldbuilding is engaging, although intentionally vague at first, unfolding throughout the course of the novel. Readers on social media have been talking about this book for years. It’s a masterclass in telling a story in minimal pages; it will tug at your heartstrings and leave you thinking for days to come.
I initially felt lost trying to understand the setting, so it took me a while to get into the book. However, as things picked up, I quickly became immersed in the story. It’s well worth your time, even if confusing at first. Usually, one of my favorite parts of reading fantasy or science fiction is actually the love stories that unfold in the pages. This book is no exception. Against all of time and space where the stakes are higher than anything we can imagine, it’s interesting and heart-wrenching to see how love continues to persist and survive.
6. Beautiful World, Where Are You by Sally Rooney
Irish novelist Sally Rooney has made herself well-known in the literary world, with her books appearing all over BookTok. Beautiful World, Where Are You was her third novel, published in 2021 as the world was still recovering from the COVID-19 pandemic. The novel alternates between the lives of best friends Alice, a successful novelist, and Eileen, who works for a literary magazine, and their philosophical emails to each other. Over the course of the book, Alice and Eileen fall in love with Felix and Simon, respectively, and discuss everything from love and sex to class and the economic structure of society.
I’m a big fan of Rooney’s writing because her novels often read more like perceptive character studies to me. I first read this book shortly after it came out, and it resonated deeply with me because we were all longing for connection during quarantine. At its core, this book is about vulnerability, understanding, and the role of love amid all the challenges of the modern world.
7. The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller
Madeline Miller’s The Song of Achilles reimagines the story of the Trojan War from the perspective of Patroclus. He’s an awkward exiled prince, but when he meets the irresistible Achilles, he can’t help but fall in love. This novel went viral on BookTok and is well-known in literary spaces for being emotionally devastating. Miller masterfully blends mythology with a real human vulnerability, offering a glimpse into what it means to be soulmates.
Don’t worry if you don’t know a lot about Greek mythology! Miller makes the story accessible for contemporary readers. At the end of the day, this is a coming-of-age story that we can relate to, even though it takes place in a different world and time. The forbidden romance showcases the emotional vulnerability that lies between every person, even demigods and war heroes.
8. Lie With Me by Philippe Besson
Philippe Besson’s bestselling novella Lie With Me is set in 1984 in rural France. Narrated by an older Philippe, the story recounts his first love with Thomas, a boy at his high school. Years later, Philippe is a famous writer and meets Thomas’s son, who comes with tragic news about his father. Besson’s writing is beautiful and tender. The love affair of Thomas and Philippe is full of longing, shame, and ultimately consequence.
While this isn’t the happiest of the books on the list, Lie With Me isn’t afraid to explore the urgency, intensity, and raw emotions of hidden love and desire. As much as the book is about first love, it’s also about the landscape that would prevent the two lovers from pursuing their relationship publicly. It’s about the consequences of shame and fear in love and how love can consume us.
9. An Apprenticeship or The Book of Pleasures by Clarice Lispector
This short novel follows the lonely schoolteacher Lori, who grows attracted to philosophy teacher Ulisses. Clarice Lispector is known for her abstract writing, and this book is no exception. Rather than its plot or love story, An Apprenticeship or The Book of Pleasures is highly regarded for its effort to bridge the gap between people and a more spiritual, metaphysical exploration of intimacy and human connection. Lispector’s prose almost reads like poetry, and the novel captures so much of what is relevant to the human experience.
Lispector’s writing is clever and surprising, often feeling like a stream-of-consciousness. The book is an unconventional take on romance, and one of the reasons it stands out to me is its message about the beauty of being alive. As much as the book is an ode to the act of loving, it also feels like an ode to life and living.
10. Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
This Russian classic is considered one of the greatest works of world literature. It follows married socialite Anna, who is unhappily married and bored with her family life. After visiting her brother’s family, she meets Count Vronsky — a wealthy military man and a bachelor — at the railway station and is instantly drawn to him. They start an extramarital affair, which sparks controversy in high society. Anna’s husband, Karenin, threatens to take their son away from her if she doesn’t end the affair. Vronsky wants her to leave Karenin and marry him instead. Only, as the affair continues, Anna grows increasingly disillusioned.
This is by no means an easy read. The lengthy novel has eight parts, featuring a cast of characters that can be hard to keep track of. However, it is definitely worthwhile because of its wide cultural impact and rich portrayals of complex characters. Anna Karenina is not a happy story, but love, societal expectations, and desire are central to the novel. It is rich with political and cultural commentary as well as philosophical reflection.
11. Latitudes of Longing by Shubhangi Swarup
Shubhangi Swarup’s debut novel is a sweeping work of magical realism split into four distinct interconnected stories that take place all across the same geologically active faultline on the Indian subcontinent. The stories are inventive and heartfelt, all exploring the connection between humans and the natural world as well as the desire for true intimacy.
This is one of my favorite books of all time. Every single word is intentionally and beautifully crafted, with Swarup’s lush descriptions inviting you into the world. The characters are both beautiful and flawed, and the way in which love permeates every story tugs at my heartstrings. Whenever I read this novel, I feel such an immense appreciation for all the small things in life.
Conclusion
Rom-coms can be fun, but they’re not for everyone. However, there are still plenty of books out there that explore love. If you’ve been hoping to add something to your reading list this Valentine’s season, I encourage you to try out one of the listed titles. There are so many books out there, across every genre, investigating the theme of love — one of the most deeply human experiences.
